From Turmoil to Transformation: Healing Trauma, Attachment, and Finding Self-Compassion

I come from a blended family where both parents were married four times each, and I lived in ten different houses by the time I graduated high school. My siblings had trauma histories, and that affected me in many ways, along with the inconsistency of where and with whom I was living. At times, my family was on church welfare, and at times, I lived a lower middle-class lifestyle. My family was somewhat religious growing up, which shaped my behavior to some degree, but my traumas also had an effect on my behavior in school and the neighborhood where I got into trouble periodically. Due to my siblings' behavior, I experienced emotional and physical abuse, and it affected certain parts of my life in different ways. Due to my parents' attachment challenges, I also was affected in the way I showed up in relationships as a young man.

Self-examination and learning about trauma, attachment, and shame has helped me to understand myself better. I have also studied and practiced different spiritual traditions, which has given me a strong foundation for mental health. I have been to a few counselors and was helped most with my traumas by Brainspotting. I was able to release negative beliefs and overwhelming feelings that were not helped with just talk therapy. Through my healing process, I have reduced negative thoughts and behaviors, developed a healthier sense of self, and created a life that I love. Find grace and compassion for yourself. Find a Brainspotting therapist who understands attachment and shame. Take as long as you need to heal. Be well.

J.D.